Episode 143

Radical Acceptance & How it is the Gateway to Authentic Growth

Published on: 30th January, 2023

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Radical Acceptance: The Gateway to Authentic Growth

Radical acceptance is a concept in psychology that refers to the practice of fully accepting and embracing all aspects of ourselves, including our thoughts, feelings, and experiences. It is about acknowledging and accepting the reality of our lives, without judgment or resistance. This practice is seen as a key component of personal growth and well-being.

One of the biggest barriers to personal growth is resistance. When we resist what is happening in our lives, we create internal conflict and struggle. This struggle can take many forms, including anxiety, depression, and anger. By accepting what is happening, we free ourselves from this resistance and can start to focus on making positive changes in our lives.

Radical acceptance is not the same as resignation or passivity. It is not about giving up or accepting defeat. Instead, it is about recognizing that some things are beyond our control and choosing to focus on what we can control. This focus allows us to take actions that will lead to positive change and growth.

Another benefit of radical acceptance is that it allows us to build a more authentic sense of self. When we accept all parts of ourselves, including our flaws and weaknesses, we are better able to understand who we truly are. This understanding can lead to greater self-esteem and confidence, which in turn can help us make positive changes in our lives.

Finally, radical acceptance is also a key component of mindfulness. Mindfulness is about being fully present in the moment and accepting things as they are, without judgment. When we practice radical acceptance, we are able to approach life with a sense of openness and curiosity, which can help us learn and grow in new ways.

In conclusion, radical acceptance is a powerful tool for personal growth and well-being. By embracing all aspects of ourselves and accepting the reality of our lives, we free ourselves from resistance and can focus on making positive changes. This focus can lead to greater self-awareness, self-esteem, and authentic growth.

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Radical Acceptance

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[00:06:04] Either way it's unhealthy. Were positive change comes from is radical acceptance. Because when we accept who we are, Let's let's first, just a moment. Let's look at the definition of acceptance. Okay. So there's a few definitions, but I'm going to pick out two that I think apply to what we're talking about. [00:06:28] The first is it says agreement with, or belief in an idea, opinion or explanation. This one here is kind of my favorite because it's really matter of fact. And that's where we want to go with this. The second one is a willingness to tolerate a difficult or unpleasant situation. That one there, I would say tends to leave lead more to, um, complacency, but.


[00:08:07] That your eyes are saggier than they used to be. And what's really interesting is when I think about other beautiful women I've met. That have saggy eyes. I can tell you multiple times I met these women and never even thought about their eyes. Until they pointed it out. [00:08:27] That being said, that is the truth with us. So much of us. So much of our judging is based on what we worry. Other people will think, feel, see, or hear about us. But in retrospect, 99% of the time. They do not see those things. We see those things, but we've projected our own judgment onto them. So let's just stop all this fragmentedness, . [00:08:51] And center ourselves and just accept what is in the moment. So I want you to take this idea of what it is that you had a fragmented or that you were judging, that you were labeling as not good, that you're resisting. And I want you to look at it objectively. Objectively means without emotion. You simply look at it as if it just is, [00:09:13] and now. [00:09:16] I want you to realize that this part of you. Does not change. Or define who you are. [00:09:27] If you can stand in front of a mirror. And look at this part of yourself. As the observer. And really do your best to get to a place of non-judgment. Acceptance. Simply observing it as if this just is. [00:09:46] Once you're in that space. Then recognize, look in your eyes and say, This doesn't change who you are. Who you are. Is and fill in the blank. Kind generous. Loving. Intelligent, whatever words you want to be, the person that you. Really are inside because in the end, that's what comes out of you. Even today at the grocery store. [00:10:16] I had this awareness because my daughter was paying. So she had a $20 bill. And, um, the lady behind the counter. Had told her the total was $14 and 84 cents or something like that. And so my daughter decides. It, she gave her money and she's just ready to go. She took her goods and she's out. Right. She didn't realize that there would be changed. And so I said to her, Hey, [00:10:40] The total was $14 and change. And you gave her a 20, I said is 14 less or more than 20. And we had a little lesson right there about why should we get money back? [00:10:52] And even then she's so cute. I just have to go on this little bunny trail. Cause my dog, I love her so much, but she was like, yay. I'm rich. I got five bucks. And I'm like, well actually you gave 14, you had 20 and now you have five. So we have to go down that. But here's the point here. I was giving this lesson, being my genuine self, smiling at the clerk, loving my daughter, doing all of this. [00:11:16] In the grocery store with makeup down my face. I probably looked like a hung over mess, even though I wasn't going over. [00:11:26] I'm just thinking about it. It's funny. But the point is. Who I was never changed because of the makeup on my face. Because I also wasn't obsessing about it. Right. Now flip the script. If I had gone in aware of it and perhaps it was makeup, I couldn't get off. Like, we all know you can get makeup off, but pretend that it was like permanent and I would always have this on my face. So everywhere I went, I had a complex, oh, people are just looking at me because of the makeup on my face. [00:11:58] I wouldn't have let myself shine because I would have been too paranoid to just be myself. But because I was unaware. And I wasn't in his place of judgment. I was myself. And that is an example. And I know you have examples like this too. It's just, sometimes we just don't bring them to the surface. [00:12:18] It's time that we do that. It's time to lower the judgment. Of these things that we want to change about ourselves, raise the acceptance. And then really ask yourself now, is there something I can do because I love myself. And I want to be different. So for example, let's go. Go back to the weight loss journey. [00:12:36] I did that. I took diet pills. I dieted so much that I have gotten my metabolism. So out of whack, That it's causing me problems at age 40. I it's become more difficult to lose weight organically. My body wants to store fat. Now with that being said, I love myself. I want to lose weight now. Not because I have an image. [00:13:00] That I worry about people seeing about me. It's because I want to be healthy. I want to thrive. I want to be there. Long-term for my family. My motivation has changed. But also I'm more whole in making my decisions. Therefore, my choices are more aligned. In other words, rather than doing a knee jerk dieting plan. [00:13:26] I would actually say no to that. And transition into something that is. More. I guess resonates with me. In a more loving capacity and, and that's what will happen when you have radical acceptance. Sometimes you have acceptance of things of yourself because it involves holistic change. Other times you'll have radical acceptance of yourself and that's the end of it. [00:13:51] All right. [00:13:53] I hope that this episode was transformational for you in some way, shape or form. And if you're ready to really transform. In your life and step into your highest self. Love yourself. Fully authentically. And shine vibrantly. I want you to reach out and connect with me. I'm offering all listeners a free transformational experience. [00:14:22] Simply get on my book. Let's get on a call. And we will tackle something. We're going to go in. Maybe it's a judgment issue. Maybe you listen to this episode and you're like, this sounds great, Lindsay. I'm just struggling with actually getting to that place of no judgment. Remember, no judgment means there's no good or bad, no right or wrong. It just is.


[00:15:57] If you feel like we would be a great fit, don't hesitate to reach out and get scheduled. That first session is complimentary. And from there, it's a simple, do you want to continue to work with me or not? There's no pressure. I appreciate you listening as always until next time. Bye. For now.

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Your host Lindsay Sutherland left her corporate career in the automotive industry to chase a dream of living in a log cabin in the woods with her family. Losing both of her parents before retirement fueled her desire to live her dream life without waiting for someday. Now, she leads others through their own transformative journey of living a meaningful joy filled life. Connect with Lindsay on her website or by email.

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About your host

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Lindsay Sutherland

Mom of 4 who left my 20 year career (and city life) to live in a log cabin in the woods. I am passionate about helping families get back to their roots by spending more time with each other. The vehicle to make that possible is passive income which is why this podcast is all about building multiple streams of income!